The Real Snowflakes
by the Stone Canyon Libs
People on the political left have been characterized by those on the political right as bleeding-heart liberals and snowflakes. To
conservatives, these terms mean weakness and a flawed value system. Yet, it's the conservatives whose delicate sensibilities are constantly triggered, and their
rationalizations can be logic-defying.
In 2013, Republican Governor of Lousiana, Bobby Jindal, speaking to the Republican National Committee, said,
“We must stop being the stupid party.”:
Click or tap to play audio
The problem is, the conservative base is happy with the direction the stupid party is taking.
Here are some examples of the things that triggered conservatives, their representatives in Congress, and right-wing media in recent years.
M&M Colors
The right-wing has been focusing on M&M colors for years now, trying to associate the colors with sexual deviancy. The animated purple M&M spokescandy in their TV ads
is supposed to represent inclusiveness and acceptance.
A few right-wing talking heads said that this spokescandy
“might be transgender.”
Tucker Carlson was disturbed that the revamped female candies were “less sexy” and disturbed that he no longer wanted to have a drink with them:
Click or tap to play audio
This caused someone on Twitter to ask, “Does Tucker Carlson know you don’t actually have sex with the M&Ms?”
Tucker Carlson Widely Mocked After Criticizing ‘Less Sexy’ M&Ms
Barbie
Many conservatives see the Barbie movie as left-wing, toxic, anti-man feminism.
Right-wing hero Ben Shapiro lit Barbie and Ken dolls on fire in a video on Twitter. We wonder if Shapiro purchased the dolls just before incinerating them or if they were already in his closet.
Perhaps conservatives would be happier with the Klaus Barbie movie?
Woke
Fighting against wokeness is core to today's conservatism, yet when asked to define wokeism, some can't do it. Here's Bethany Mandel, the author of a book on wokeness,
being asked to define wokeness by interviewer Brianna Joy Gray:
Click or tap to play audio
Crocs
Conservatives hate Crocs footwear. Why? They're worn by gays...and women...and children...and...
Black Little Mermaid
Not all Conservatives hated Disney's casting Black actress Halle Bailey in the part of
Ariel in the Little Mermaid movie, but many flooded social media with hateful racist comments.
Bud Light
Anheuser-Busch sent a few cans of Bud Light to trans woman and Tik Tok star Dylan Mulvaney. The right-wing went nuts when Mulvaney drank one on Tik Toc. They called
for a boycot of Bud Light. There were videos of cases of Bud Light being destroyed by AK-47-wielding lunatics like Kid Rock.
The beer company was happy that their beer was purchased, even if the buyers didn't drink it.
American Doll
When Americn Doll Company published a Smart Girl’s Guide: Body Image book that included language that was a bit woke, conservatives claimed that the book (and perhaps the dolls) would corrupt their children.
Critics pan American Girl book for handling of gender, trans identity
Sesame Street
If you listen to conservative cable TV long enough, you'll have to deal with
logic problems such as “Racism doesn't exist”, and “Sesame
Street's Elmo is responsible for it.”
CPAC head Matt
Schlapp has mentioned numerous times that the Sesame Street TV show should be
defunded. It finally happened during the Second Administration of Donald Trump.
Fox News host talks race by calling out the real enemy: Sesame Street's Elmo
BBC: Sesame Street heads to Netflix after Trump pulled funding
Light bulbs
The Energy Independence and Security Act of 2007
forced electric lighting to be 25 percent more efficient by 2014. It was passed by the Democratic majority in Congress.
Naturally, Fox News made a big deal about this injustice, so many conservatives bought a lifetime supply of the old inefficient bulbs before the law took effect.
Given that newer LED bulbs last far longer and now cost about the same, this was a silly move. Here's Neil deGrasse Tyson explaning why LED bulbs are so much more efficient:
Click or tap to play audio
Miranda rights
Conservatives don't like that police must read Miranda rights to anyone they arrest. “Criminal suspects shouldn't have Miranda rights. They're criminals.”
And now they have the conservative-majority Supreme Court agreeing: Supreme Court’s conservative majority rules
suspects cannot claim civil rights violations if Miranda rights violated
Taking a knee
Football players who protest the murders of unarmed black men by taking a knee during the national anthem makes conservatives crazy. They think that protest in any form is unacceptable
regardless of the injustice.
Jade Helm 15
Many conservatives believed that military exercises in the U.S., such as the Jade Helm 15 exercize, was really an Obama plan to round up dissidents in preparation for Martial Law.
Click or tap to play audio
Wikipedia: Jade Helm 15 conspiracy theories
Army Times: Jade Helm 15: Controversial military exercise starts Wednesday
Tunnels
Conservatives invented a conspiracy theory based on these two unrelated facts:
- several Walmart stores suddenly shut down in April 2015
- Someone posted a photo of a boring machine that has an Air Force logo to social media.
They claim the military is boring tunnels between abandoned Walmart stores to allow troops and weapons to be deployed anywhere in
the United States in minutes, and completely hidden from view.
Snopes: Walmart Closure Conspiracy Theories
FEMA death camps
Some conservatives believed that FEMA has death camps, which explains FEMA's stockpiles of body bags and coffins. The first phase will be
the rounding up of law-abiding U.S. citizens and imprisoned at one of hundreds of military bases. The second phase will be...well,...think
Nazi Germany.
SPLC: Fear of FEMA
Dixie Chicks
The Dixie Chicks criticized George W. Bush for starting two wars that cost eight trillion dollars and lasted over twenty years.
So, they had to be cancelled.
Wikipedia: Dixie Chicks controversy
Gay wedding cakes
Conservatives were upset that shopkeepers and bakers were not able to discriminate against gay couples by refusing to sell them wedding cakes.
Sleeveless
Michelle Obama was too much for right-wing conservatives. Sleeveless dresses and bare shoulders drove them nuts, yet they were OK with nude photos of Melania Trump.
Some went as far as believing that Michelle Obama is a man:
Click or tap to play audio
Michelle Obama's bare arms stir controversy
Non-English
Conservatives are a monolingual crowd. They don't like anyone speaking a language other than English in their country.
Radio station cuts ties with conservative host after she filmed herself yelling at landscapers for speaking Spanish
Two women detained for speaking Spanish
Mt. McKinley
Conservatives hate returning Anglicized names of places back to the original native
names, such as
Mount McKinley back to Denali.
On January 20,2025, Donald Trump issued an Executive Order renaming Denali back to Mt. McKinley.
NY Times: 3,000 Miles From Denali, Ohio Fumes Over Renaming of Mount McKinley
Karens
Many conservatives don't like when Black Americans enjoy their benefits of citizenship. This famous photo is of a woman who phoned police when two Black
men were barbequing in a public park, in an area designated for barbequing. She was apparently calling to report the crime barbequing while black.
We're waiting for a ruling on whether barbequing while Asian is also a thing.
White Woman Calls Police on Black Family's BBQ for 'Trespassing' in Oakland Park
Happy holidays
Saying Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas makes them very unhappy. Apparently, it's insulting to Christians to have any other religion recognized.
It's because they believe the United States is a Christian nation, and that the founding fathers created it to be a theocracy, regardless of what the First Amendment to the
Constitution says.
The First Amendment was adopted in 1791. The founding fathers wanted religious freedom and no state religion.
Starbucks' Coffee Cups
Look closely at this Starbucks coffee cup. See the "Happy Holidays" in the upper left? To conservatives, this
apparently means that Starbucks is saying there is no God and is an attack on the baby Jesus.
How Starbucks’s annual holiday cup became a battleground for the heart and soul of America
Fox Host: “The War On Christmas [Is] Off To An Early Start” On Starbucks' Coffee Cups
Food stamps
The conservative war on the poor is never-ending. They don't like poor people getting a free-ride on their tax dollars. They equate being poor with being lazy.
“Once you give lazy poor people food stamps, they'll be back for more.”
“We need to be able to force people who use food stamps to only buy foods that we think they should eat.”
Ammunition
Back in 2013, conservative gun owners complained that the government was buying too much ammunition, and there wasn't enough available for them to purchase.
They were afraid that they would be outgunned when they had to battle U.S. military troops to take back the country.
Outgunned? By a military funded with over $700 billion a year?
Is The Obama Administration The Cause Of Gun Ammunition Shortages?
Books
Conservatives hate it when books are read that don't comply with their world view. So, they banned
more than 1,600 books during the 2021-22 school year
Grooming
Conservatives reacted to a Pride display of clothing in a Northern California Target store with a boycott and threats of violence.
Bethel Women’s Pastor Promotes Target Boycott Citing Concerns Over Child “Sexualization”
School lunches
Many conservatives don't want schools to provide milk and lunch to poor students. Some think the students should get a job before or after school to pay for it. One Congressman suggested that schools should fire
their janitors and use student labor instead.
Mitch McConnell is reportedly opposing free school lunches
Idaho Lawmaker Wants Children to Work for Those Free Lunches
Restrooms
Have you noticed how much time and energy go into conservatives ranting about restrooms and who uses them?
How far would they take this?
Anti-transgender bathroom hysteria, explained
Coffee cups
GOP Congressmen were the heros to conservatives when they brought back polystyrene cups to the Congressional cafeterias. A previous woke Congress had replaced the non-recyclable
cups with ceramic cups to better protect the environment.
Republicans recycle an old idea: the foam plastic coffee cup